it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize