a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
