You're completely useless in the revolution.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
