My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
