and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Randomize
