no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
