so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
