i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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