It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Randomize
