How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I need a beard to bite.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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