I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
