Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
