well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
