i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Let's get the cat blown out
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
