is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
