we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
