I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
