Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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