Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
