oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
