i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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