somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize