last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
