remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
