i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
