I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
