it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize
