We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
