No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
