So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
