ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
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