I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize