doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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