He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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