Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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