Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Randomize
