I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
