jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
