I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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