Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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