Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
