Cold hands, warm shart.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
