is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
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