do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Randomize
