Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
