White coat. Heels.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I love you. Go after that dick
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
