I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
