Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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