New low: just hacked my moms facebook
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
You were trust falling into bushes
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
