I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.�
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
